Strictly Come Tweeting (14.11.15)


Tonight's evening in the Ephgrave household (flat) consisted of eating cheese and biscuits – like the aspirational middle-class people we are – and watching Strictly – like our inner Plebeians. See below for the usual Twitter-based nonsense; how much sense it makes out of context is up to interpretation.


           6:55pm: Len could at least have the decency to get up off his seat.
6:56pm: "Singer and loose woman, Jamelia."
7:00pm: By being on TV tonight, Gleb just made fifteen million female viewers pregnant.
7:01pm: We've all seen Gleb in the park on a Saturday night, haven't we? HAVEN'T WE?
7:03pm: Bruno's 'Gleb / park' quip may have been an invitation.
7:07pm: Jay's dance started with some serious chest-thrusting-out-in-a-waistcoat action.
7:10pm: He missed Hans at the end? I must have missed Hans too.
7:10pm: Jay's neckwear: tie of a cravat? You decide.
7:12pm: Jay's compass tattoo has no inner workings.
7:17pm: I suspect @glyndoggett will be passionately miming along to the falsetto bits during Jamelia's dance.
7:18pm: Unnecessary Grinding: a magazine I subscribe to.
7:22pm: Tess may have her voice back this week, but she's lost her hairbrush.
7:24pm: One judge on each end of the chiffon then.
7:27pm: "Get them up the M1". Euphemism?
7:32pm: The split in Katie Derham's skirt is so high, it's actually above her head.
7:33pm: I don't like rumba's and I'm not Anton and Katie's biggest fan, but I have to say, I quite liked that.
7:34pm: I also don't like the misplaced apostrophe in my last tweet.
7:40pm: Please can we have a Mark Benton cameo during Kevin & Kellie's dance?
7:48pm: You're My World = GREAT SONG.
7:50pm: I liked how at the end of Peter & Janette's routine they cleaned the floor with her dress. Nice touch.
7:58pm: I was terrified for Georgia during that lift. Madness.
8:05pm: I feel for the singer having to do a Paul Weller impression. Proof of their versatility.
8:08pm: I had pyrotechnics blasting from both ends once. Horrific.

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