Suspect Dimensions.


Ladies and gentleman, pray silence for My First Digger.


It's not really mine. It belongs to someone else. I spotted it on my way into town last Sunday. Its tininess was astounding. Driving across even the most modest building site would take an aeon. Its size almost negates the point of using it; you may as well bend down and pick the the dirt up yourself.

Operating it would make me self-conscious. I’d worry it was going to topple over at any moment. It looks like a ride you'd see outside a supermarket. Either that, or it’s a prop from an aborted Transformers / Short Circuit movie mash-up.

I never knew that Fisher Price made construction equipment. Maybe I’m the one that's not to scale. See Exhibits A, B and C for reference.


It’s all a question of perspective.

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