Music Was My First Love.


It suddenly hit me this morning that for the past decade I've completely neglected my music. 

The problem is I've mixed things up in my head. I said to myself recently that I wouldn't play any more, as I no longer really enjoyed it. I've since realised that it's not music as a whole that’s the issue; more the type of music that I’ve been playing.

All the tours I've done as an actor / musician have lifted my musical ability, but stagnated my writing. 

Part of the reason is I always used to be in a band. Even when I was the main writer, I still disguised my input by being surrounded by other musicians. This gave me more confidence in my material, as well as the motivation to see a song through. 

I've always worked best to a deadline. The minute the band finished, I no longer had the reason to write. The fact that I was always working also gave me less time to even consider doing it. 

I got out my acoustic this morning on a whim and played through a few of my old songs. Admittedly, my voice is a little out of shape, but it was nice to stretch a few muscles that have been untouched for so long. Bizarrely, it no longer seems as if I wrote them. I start to see them from the outside looking in; some aren’t so great, but others I’m quite proud of.

Perhaps I should give myself a metaphorical kick up the arse and get back to my first love. I've got to do it sooner or later.

After all, I'm not getting any younger. If I was, that would just be weird.

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